The Adventures of Captain Random

17 Mar

Fisher was chock full of random goodness this morning.  I fancy myself as the Queen of Random.  It is the only thing that I truly excel at.  (Unless you can count avoiding laundry…I do that very well.)  I was pleased then, to discover that Fisher had inherited this wonderful gem in my personality.  (Ahem.)

To give you a little bit of the background story, every morning on the way to school, Fisher begs for me to take a different route.  I prefer to catch the bypass, where he prefers cutting through town so that I can catch every red light.  Aw.  So thoughtful.  This morning, as I neared Fisher’s desired detour, I braced myself for his pleas.  Instead, he asked, “Moooommy.  Can I driiiive?”  (Said in the most drawn out manner.) 

“Um, no, son.  That’s a negative.”  “You see, your legs are too short to reach the pedals, your torso is too short to see over the steering wheel, and, well, you’re far too young.” 

“But Jaden gets to drive!” 

(Blank Stare)  “That’s news to me, buddy.”

Soon we were on the bypass and were driving along at a nice 65MPH.  Then, Captain Random piped up again:  “Mommy!  Where’s the baby shop?!”  (As if this peculiar store, that does not exist, had suddenly gone missing.)

“What?!”

“You know!  The baby store, where you buy babies!”

“Fishman, I don’t have the slightest clue.”  (Really, how do you even begin to answer that one?)

After a few minutes of awkward silence, Fisher capped off the ride to school with this statement:  “I saw a monster outside of my window this morning.”

“Really? What was he doing?”

“He was on a bear hunt.”

(Riiiiight.)  “Is that so?” 

“Yes, and he scared me!”

“Fisher, you know that monsters aren’t real.” 

“Uh huh!”

“Have you ever seen one?” 

“Yes!  He had big hands.”

At that point I decided to give up.  I had no other moves to make.  If a large-handed monster was hunting bears near my house, I guessed that I’d just have to live with it.

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One Response to “The Adventures of Captain Random”

  1. shaunana March 17, 2010 at 8:23 AM #

    <3

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