Saturday Special Report

9 Jan

Let’s talk about underwear.    Particularly, women’s underwear.

Where has all of the comfortable underwear gone?

When it comes to comfort, all you want is something that fits snuggly and covers all of your needs:

Explain to me, then, how this is comfortable.

Does anyone out there have a buttocks that slope upwards at the sides?  Hmm?  No?  My thoughts exactly.   It misses covering your cheeks by about 20%.  It’s unacceptable.  *dun-uh*

A proper behind is rounded.  So shouldn’t underwear be rounded too? (I know what you’re thinking, where did this come from?!) Just hear me out.

My favorite pair of jeans are pocketless on the back and therefore showcase the type of underwear I’ve chosen to wear for the day.  (Curse you, panty line!) And, unless you’re wearing granny-panties, you’re going to be flashing off your defunct underwear to your co-workers all day.  The horror.

I’m not a prude, I swear.  It’s just that I don’t want to do the underwear dance all day again like I’ve done today.  You know, it’s the dance where you try to discreetly adjust your underwear in public. We all know the dance. (It’s similar to the one that women do to adjust their bra, but with a little more hip action.)

*In Mr. Moviefone’s Voice* Can’t underwear be cute and comfortable at the same time?  Will women be forever forced to wage the war against ascending panty lines?! (Pause for effect)  I certainly hope so.

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One Response to “Saturday Special Report”

  1. amy lynn January 11, 2010 at 10:28 AM #

    So I am right there with you. This may be TMI, but I currently own two pair of underwear that are my ALL TIME FAVORITE! My hubby actually bought them for me. They are a cute boy short style from Victoria’s Secret. They are seriously the most comfy undies ever. And they dont show a panty line! *sigh* I love when my whole butt is covered.

    :)

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